Choley moley

We got a new Korean English teacher this week, who is, for lack of a better descriptor, acceptable. Kind of obnoxious. Questionable voice. Decent at English, I guess.

There is one major problem with her, and that is her name: Chole.

No, that is not a typo of 'Chloe', as I assumed it was when my boss tried to ask me how to pronounce the English name 'C-H-O-L-E'. I told her that she probably ought to e-mail this chick, get her to clarify if she meant Chloe, or if she was totally off-base and drunk and e-mailed her name completely wrong.

But in walks this girl on Thursday, cheerful, all, "Hello, my name is Chole." In my mind, very mature, I instantly think of 'troll' or 'chode', or most expediently 'troll chode'. I can't say her name to her face, or really to anybody in any context, for that matter.

And I'm not just being a total douche here, making fun of someone for an obscure name. The Internet, Pinnacle of Truth, tells me that 'Chole' is not a name. One site says it is sometimes a nickname of 'Nichole', which could make it's pronunciation 'cole', even if it were a name, which six other databases feel it is not.

I have taken to calling her Voldemort, as in, there is no fucking way I am saying her name in everyday discourse, because something bad will happen. Choledemort. Oy vey, these teachers.